Why I choose to live in Garner, NC.

Have a script due today, so I stopped at the local Dunkin Donuts for coffee and a bowtie — and to look this thing over before heading into the office.

Was there about 30 minutes, and as I was getting ready to leave, this rather large woman came in, got in line, waited through 4-5 customers, and got a large coffee with "a whole lotta cream." She walked out right in front of me, obviously in a hurry and irritated by the wait.

Out in the parking lot was a big Buick or something, with a paintjob that had been beaten to hell by the sun. The driver's window was down and another big woman was behind the wheel. In her left hand was a cigarette. In her right hand was a puffy Cheeto. The Cheetos bag was in her lap.

Seeing her friend/mama/whoever come out with the coffee, the Cheeto lady yelled "We gotta git to the courthouse!"

It was all I could do to get to the car before I busted out laughing. And I'm really curious about what they're doing at the courthouse.